Perspective is a lot of what I work with, for myself, for clients and even for students.
Perspective can change everything.
An interesting perspective that many people I work with (and some people in my personal life) have is regarding competition. Specifically, that they want to have the most, best, biggest, fastest, fanciest…whatever. They want to achieve, buy and earn the most/best. And when they don’t, they dislike those people who do. They may even try and undercut, downplay, or criticize someone for having what they think they want for themselves (weight, cars, clothes, friends, anything…). And then they either get really frustrated at themselves, give up, or they get really determined to win (or some combination of those).
I read something recently that said the most highly evolved person is one who is happy for everyone else’s success, no matter what. This indicates that you know that if someone else has something you want, it doesn’t mean that there’s not enough for you too!
Hence, the bigger pie analogy. Don’t lust after someone else’s piece of pie, just make a bigger pie so you can have some too.
When you realize that they aren’t taking your piece, the pie automatically gets bigger.
Whenever I get a twinge of jealousy about something, I remind myself of this. As a recovering overachiever, it has helped me a lot to stop comparing my path to other people’s lives.
Also, about the whole grass is greener on the other side of the fence mentality…It might look greener from where you’re standing, but really, the greenness depends on how you care for it… and their grass? It’s just different grass. It has nothing to do with yours.
Sometimes I sense this kind of tension, especially among people who are professionals or enthusiasts trying to make a name for themselves in any given arena. Trying to be exclusive or clique-y or elite—doesn’t do anything for you. People may follow you for a while, and you may boost your esteem a bit (and play on the lack of esteem of your followers). But, especially in the area of wellness and healthy eating, we’re actually all on the same team!
So…anyone wanna collaborate on something? 🙂
We could: Pick a cause and promote it. Make a product and sell it. Think of an idea and share it.
What do you think? Are you for collaborating or do you prefer to work alone (whether it’s in blogging, working, or recreation)?
I used to think I was competitive, but now I know I’m not. I’d rather just make connections with people who jive with me…and still be friendly to those who don’t.
Remember this quote?
”I’ve got what I’ve got, which is a lot. If that warms your cockles, let’s talk. If not, my engine is running, and I trust that your tribe is waiting for you elsewhere.”