Would Be. Should Be. Could Have. Did.

Today would be my sister’s 12th anniversary. But she only cleared her 5th by 24 days. This feels real in some ways, and impossible in others.

I should be prepping to grade papers at 4am, and instead I’m watching TV (you know I don’t have cable at home, right? …This feels totally indulgent, but also reminds me that I don’t really need/want TV in my life regularly).

I could have ordered room service, gone to dinner with workshop counterparts, or eaten the Trader Joe’s chocolate bar for dinner, but instead I navigated myself through the rain in the dark to Whole Foods. Worth it, for sure. I’m still so humbled by driving by the Washington Monument.

I did learn a lot today, participated in a group meditation with 270 people involving yelling and dancing, connected with my 11 small group partners in an indescribable way, and had a great revelation that led me straight to the clarity I’ve been asking for. I’ll tell you what it is later. I hope your day was at least as good as mine, and that would be hard to do!