I’m a few days late on this update, but I figured I better get it in if I plan to do any more updates before Baby E shows up. And honestly, the pic is from 37 weeks, but if I have to take another it’s gonna hold me back on posting again because I am in my pjs right now!
Here’s the thing—I am SO tired. The midwife told me that my body is working so hard right now that I should just go with it and take naps and walk when I can. Duly noted. I am the nap queen right now.
I’ve also been pretty nauseous at times, almost like first trimester nauseous. But, carbs help… so I’m going with that too. I’ve had my share of bread and ice cream lately—and I’m looking forward to just feeling good again so I can eat the way that makes me feel best (when I’m not pregnant). Eventually.
I have a lot of Braxton Hicks contractions, and lots of mild cramping, but it’s just sort of uncomfortable. Baby E hardly ever stops moving–I like that that part. Although, I’m pretty sure he’s out of room–he kicks upward and then jams his head into my cervix. That part feels really weird and hurts. But I totally understand his frustration and need to stretch his legs.
My skin is glowing, and I love that part too. My hair is gross—I always heard pregnant hair was great, not mine. I wear it up mostly because the texture is annoying. At least it’s not falling out.
I feel big. I don’t mind it like I thought I would.
I feel patient. I didn’t think I would.
I realized all of a sudden, a few weeks ago, that I’m actually going to have a baby after all this, and I’m so happy about that.
I spend a lot of time alone these days since I work at home and I’m not into being really social right now. I’m loving it. I’m overwhelmed (in a good way) with the feeling that I am exactly where I’m supposed to be, doing exactly what I am supposed to be doing.
I don’t really know how much weight I’ve gained–I think it’s between 35 and 40 pounds, but I do know I don’t really like the feeling of having extra weight (aside from the baby). In the year before I got pregnant, I had SO found my groove with eating and activity–I was the leanest I’ve ever been (since I did gymnastics in high school), and felt the best I’ve ever felt. I am looking forward to not having the belly so I can move freely again. I probably haven’t done a good job overall of working with the belly and staying active over the last few weeks. I haven’t been doing a lot of yoga or walking (it doesn’t feel good anymore). I know lots of sources and people say to be active everyday all the way till the end, but I’m following how it feels more than just following advice. I would do more if it felt good. And I’m doing more than nothing, so I’m just being content with that.
I’ve been thinking about my sister a lot. Our pregnancies have nothing in common, but I’m so grateful that in spite of how awful it has been to have lost her, I have been able to love her son as if he was my own. He’s the best kid ever, and I’m sure he’ll never know what he has added to my life. I feel like having my own baby is like a second opportunity for me, and I can’t wait for my two favorite boys to meet. Matthew will be visiting with my mom in August. I know he and my mom are looking for some of the clothes and things I saved from when Matthew was a baby to give to Baby E (we’ve all moved a lot, so who knows if they’ll find it). I think about it all and time travel in my mind 10 years into the past. That little dude has taught me about what is really important in life. He has no idea. Thinking about the time he and I spent together in the “old days” and the things we did makes me really emotional (which may also be partially due to pregnancy hormones), and I love it.
Pregnancy is not my favorite thing, but at this point, I feel really good about it. I’m ready for E, and at the same time, I’m enjoying just floating through the last days of this. We’ve got a good plan for E’s birth, that I’m also comfortable throwing out the window if I need to. My due date is June 5th, so who knows when he’ll be here. I’ll let you know!
How’d your labor start? I’m kind of obsessed with birth stories right now!
If you want to join my essential oils focused facebook group, click here and join! I’m spending a lot of my time these days experimenting with essential oils (for pregnancy-related stuff and also more general things). So I’m going to try and post it there, rather than overwhelming my blog with all things essential oils!