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Friends as Family

by Lisa on March 10, 2012

This post is dedicated to my friend Petra. Because we finally got together today—went to a yoga class (Vish’s yoga, sometimes misunderstood in conversation to be Vicious Yoga), and then spent almost three hours in Starbucks reaffirming why we’re friends.

Side note: I drank too much coffee today.

My dinner last night with Carol was fabulous too—we went to the Red Dove Tavern in Geneva. I’d like to go back there soon—anyone? As Carol noted afterward in a text—we spent three hours at dinner and it felt like 30 minutes.

Tomorrow, my friend date is with Kyle (that’s a girl—please don’t call her a boy because it pisses her off, and the “your parents must have wanted a boy” jokes are just not funny!). What are we gonna do? Drink wine? Do yoga? Who knows. Something good, I’m sure of it.

Obviously, I’m feeling really social this weekend–friend dates all around!

One thing I’ve learned since my sister left me (how’s that wording for playing a victim?), is that we must create our families and work on maintaining them. I’m really very close with my Mom and Dad, but not really with anyone else I’m related to. (Not that I don’t like them–and we have fun when we see each other, but they’re not my people). I used to occasionally worry about this—what happens when I get old and have no one? But now I realize that scenario is impossible because of my friends.

You know when you meet someone and click? I have friends like that–it takes effort to schedule time together, but when we’re together it doesn’t take effort to be present (and have fun).

It’s super easy to get wrapped up in our own lives, and let the friendships slide a little. I’m pledging not to let that happen!

Are you good at staying in touch with friends? 

Are your friends your family? Tell me a friend-as-family story! 


  • http://disheanddishes.wordpress.com/ hännah

    I am TERRIBLE at staying in touch with people.  I get so wrapped up in my day-to-day stuff that I forget to make time for the people who really matter.  And then we drift apart.  The funny thing is that I feel that strong friendships are vital for my happiness in life.  Thanks for helping to inspire me to walk my talk a little more.

  • http://www.cottercrunch.com lindsay cotter

    i am the same way, when i reconnect, i really RECONNECT. It’s a good 3 hour wine or coffee date. It’s thorough, it’s real, it’s needed! yes.

  • Anonymous

    It’s been really tough with some friends since we all started having kids.  But the ones I love the most are the ones who you may not see for a very long time, but when you do, it’s like you were seeing each other everyday.

  • http://www.thatgirlkyle.com Kyle

    like like like.
    ps, what ARE we doing tomorrow?!

  • http://www.1970kikiproject.wordpress.com/ cathy@1970kikiproject

    ah – this post makes my heart sing, lisa!! i am so glad you are having such a fun weekend with socials! and i LOL’d over too much coffee!!! starbucks, no less!
    as you know, i am really MAKING the effort to meet up with friends and this is the best part of my kiki project, so far. i knew it’d be fun to go out, but it’s proving WAY more fun than i anticipated. you are right – you have to make the effort, make the time, and we’re all *so busy,* but the payoff is so worth it.
    i totally believe in friends as family. i am very close with my mom, dad, brother, sil, two nieces, but my friends (most of my close ones are female) are my sisters, aunts, cousins.
    enjoy your meet-up today!! and thanks for sharing about this topic!

  • Gina (Candid RD)

    I used to feel like I Was bad at keeping in touch with friends, but now I’m finding it’s really the opposite, my friends are bad at keeping in touch with me!  I have so many friends who have moved out west our to the east coast, and they never stay in touch, it’s so sad.  My local friends, however, always keep in touch and Nick and I try to do things as a couple often, or by ourselves.  It’s SO important to keep good friends!!

  • http://www.thrive-style.com Lisakthrives

    I don’t know……Eat? Drink? Talk? Yoga? All? Do you still need to go to the mall? We could do that and then eat at the Chang. Or G-town—-Halsey’s, Red Dove….? I’m up for anything! I guess I could email you privately about it though…

  • http://www.pure2raw.com/ Pure2raw twins

    we admit we are not the best with staying in touch with friends, we are doing better with it now. but our life and to do list gets in the way that pushes us away from our friends, especially being business owners – our business always takes over. so we hope one day that we will have more time to catch up with our friends! :)  

  • http://thehealthybeehive.com/ Jane

    For sure!  As someone who doesn’t have a strong family base, my friends definitely are my family!   I’m glad you have people like that – super important!   Especially for sanity :)

  • Heather (Where’s the Beach)

    I think friends are so very important. Just because you’re related doesn’t mean you will always be best pals or anything. Friends become part of your family. 

  • http://caitplusate.com/ Caitlin

    Friend dates are so essential! I love it when time flies like that with them. I have made a lot of new friends through blogging and whenever we get together even if its for the first time, the hours are like minutes. I am also close with my parents but not many other relatives because they are so far away and my brother is not too talkative. My sister and I try to stay in touch via text but she is away at school and so we don’t “feel” as close as we are when she’s home. I have been having TONS of friend dates lately, it’s been fantastic to meet new people and catch up with the old pals but at the same time I have been a bit stressed over all the plans I’ve had. A good problem to have – so many friends, so little time – but a stressful one sometimes too. I need some downtime!

  • http://eatdrinkbreathesweat.com/ Jess

    Such a beautiful message! I am SO glad you have friends like that – I call friends like that sister-friends because that’s truly what they are to me. I’m so glad you friends like that in your life, they are such blessings.

  • http://fitapproach.com/ Alyse

    Beautiful! I have to remind myself to really invest in building and maintaining strong relationships. I get so caught up in day-t0-day stuff that I easily lose sight of what really matters. 

    I also think the friendships that feel effortless—when you can go long lengths of time without speaking or seeing someone, and then when you come back together it’s as though no time has passed—are so, so magical. 

  • http://merigoesround.com/ meri

    some of my friends are my family but also all of my family are my best friends- both! I’d say sunday of Daylight Saving time is a great day to choose overcaffeination :)

  • http://alexiaku.wordpress.com/ ALexia @NamasteYoga

    i know exactly what you mean… yesterda i met one of my best friends for brunch after not having seen her for more than a months! and we live in the same city. its crazy! as soon as we saw each other we couldnt stop talking anymore, it was great- like u said- with some people you just click.

  • Anonymous

    I’m pretty good with staying in touch with friends, but I don’t see them as often as I’d like.  I’m really close with my friends, but since I have 3 sisters and so much family, I’m the most close with them. It’s just how we grew up!

    I do consider my best friend family though because we grew up around each others families since the 2nd grade!

  • http://blissfulbritt.com/ Brittany

    Spending time with friends can’t be matched. Not even by chocolate. I love that you had  a few good days with your girls! I LOVE the name Kyle for a girl..I have thought many times about having a girl and naming her a “boy” style name like Kyle, or Ryan. 

    I stay in touch with the friends that are important to me, because of this I only have a few really close friends. Aside from my cousin, I wouldn’t call any of my family members “friends.”

    I’m down to go with you to the tavern..give me about a day to get to you and we will make a day of it! =)

  • http://www.DiningAndDishing.com/ Dining and Dishing

    Relationships of any kind definitely take work, you’re absolutely right! I think it’s really important to spend face-to-face time with those who are important to you. Texting, emails and phone calls are great, but nothing beats true QT together. 

  • Anonymous

    Its so so true. As the saying goes-friends truly are the family you choose. I am pretty good at staying in touch with my friends and family! I am actually going to be in my best friend from high schools wedding in October!

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